tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-45708443110009190972024-02-18T21:02:09.967-08:00freesparrowfreesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.comBlogger209125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-20206800416563494982018-12-28T14:09:00.000-08:002018-12-28T14:09:17.005-08:00been a minuteit is almost 2019.<br />
<br />
i don't even know what to write about the past five years.<br />
<br />
i just wanted a space to write out some thoughts and new year's resolutions.<br />
<br />
what i want my grandchildren to say about me:<br />
<br />
"she always had time for us."<br />
<br />
"she knew the Bible soooooo well. it was crazy how many verses and psalms and passages she knew by heart."<br />
<br />
"she respected and adored our grandpa so much. they loved being together as much as possible."<br />
<br />
"she was always willing to help."<br />
<br />
"she never complained."<br />
<br />
"she prayed all the time. if she said 'i'll pray for you', she meant it and she would follow up. tons of people asked her to pray for them."<br />
<br />
"she laughed a LOT, especially at herself."<br />
<br />
"she was a great listener."<br />
<br />
"she was an awesome cook and loved to feed people. people were always coming over to her house or she was taking someone a meal."<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
man. I don't think any of those things except maybe cooking are true. I am grateful for this season of life home with two babies because so many things i used to spend a ton of time and effort on (work=other peoples' kids, working out, tons of friendships and activities) now are not important to me. and things like values and character and what kind of people ev and deya will be are so vitally important to me. i am thankful for how slow and spacious and unseen this life is. yes, it can be lonely, but the hardest things are not loneliness, because i get such a kick out of everett and deya is so cute- i don't care if i share them or not. also, i don't have close friends here in denver like i did in memphis or california so i'm not trying to 'balance' anything. i love spending time with spencer and deya and ev and wish we somehow had an income without spencer having to work so we could spend more time together.<br />
<br />
that said, i do think some things could change for the better. i spend too much time on pointless social media. i don't want to be someone who goes back and forth with the 'taking a break' thing, but it's so easy to waste time looking for something on a swap website or tickets or info to an event. i think i need some sort of block of time or guideline like 'no phone when the kids are awake or when it's me and spencer time.' but then that leaves naptime and I really want to read actual books or workout then.<br />
<br />
we will try that for now. plus, eventually when my sleep gets better, wake up early again to read my bible. i need a way to help me consistently memorize the word. i need a world without apps though.<br />
and pray. i do have a prayer app that is good, and i used to use it when feeding deya but now she pays attention to it.<br />
<br />
there we go. i need to go feed schme face now that she has cried for an hour. she does not take good afternoon naps but she is sleeping through the night for 3 weeks now. we will see what letting her cry does for a few days because today i went in to calm her and she just cried while i held her so im gonna go with sleep training and she will hopefully get into it ok after a week.freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-78980703623305684042014-10-05T12:24:00.001-07:002014-10-05T12:24:18.216-07:00fall breaki have the next week off of school. part of what i love most about being a teacher is the rhythmic pattern of life that is a school calendar. especially here in the south where fall break is a thing (not to mention fall itself).<br />
<br />
i have so many plans and it is tempting to make a calendar for myself, but then again i am a spontaneous person. it's been a recent goal to not change our dinner plans based on my mood, because that was really frustrating to spencer to try and cook only to have me come home late and say, 'naw- i'd rather have ______.'<br />
<br />
but i do love lists and crossing things off, so here we go in no hierarchical order:<br />
<br />
sit and be online however much i want<br />
read some books<br />
bake zucchini muffins<br />
track down a place that sells farro and make more<br />
try new recipes that are vegetable-centric<br />
have fires in our firepit on the deck<br />
switch our bedroom and the extra bedroom because the other one is bigger<br />
take tubs of stuff to good will<br />
sell some of my clothes i never wear and use the money to buy new clothes<br />
go walking/running because it is GORGEOUS outside<br />
put new songs on my iphone<br />
work a couple hours each day so it doesn't pile up (yes, teachers always work)<br />
call friends who are far away<br />
keep tucci away from spencer so he can finish his album (spencer, not tucci)<br />
mow the lawn and move some bushes/plant new ones so our yard is not a shame to the block<br />
read my bible and not just that but spend time dwelling in God's presence each day<br />
pray<br />
hang pictures and curtains on our plaster walls<br />
deep clean some areas in our house that have been neglected<br />
ichat with family<br />
meet with someone about putting money into a 401k (something i have never done but really need to start)<br />
replant herbs in the planters on the deck and squirrel-proof the dirt with mesh or rocks<br />
figure out a plan for cooking and keeping the house clean that breaks things into small daily tasks so all my breaks don't have to be catch up time<br />
hopefully get a new bathroom sink and install it<br />
buy new sheets<br />
buy a new journal<br />
<br />
that seems like a lot, but i have 7 days and part of today.<br />
<br />
i am also really excited because spencer and i are going to forgo using our credit card this month to see how much money we can save and really stick to our budget. i am excited to see how it changes our spending habits and mindset about money. thanks, jerk in brooklyn who stole our credit card info and got our card cancelled yet again- you inspired us to make a life change! Oh, and God knows who you are.<br />
<br />
happy sunday afternoon! we're off to two open houses that our friend Thomas is doing. No, we're not in the market, we just always love getting ideas;)<br />
<br />
>>>>>>> tara noellefreesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-52831406118877109842014-05-21T20:35:00.001-07:002014-05-21T20:35:35.728-07:00letters to my studentsdear antwan,<br />
<br />
Wow! What a year it has been! I think you were in 3 different classes this year, and I think being in my 4th block ended up being horrible for you. for many reasons- tyreke and you are great friends, but you were awful in the same class. ELA is the hardest class for many students because they're behind in reading, and then you had it at the end of the day! It was like a perfect combination of bad luck. and i now i did not make it easier because I always got on you for every little thing. you see, I have seen other students who are good at sports-and they get treated special- teachers bend the rules for them, let them get by without doing homework, all because they think that the sport is what will help the student. that may be true. But letting someone do something like always get water or never do homework - and not being the same toward all the other students- that is not fair. and in the long run, I think it is better not to let someone get arrogant and think they are above the rules. You will think other rules in life don't apply to you then.<br />
<br />
I'm not saying this <i>will</i> happen, but i don't want it to happen to you. You seem to be really good at basketball, i just don't want you to think you're going to the NBA- if you do- AWESOME! i will buy a "BEANS" Jersey ;) But if you don't, then what? what do you want to do in life? start your own league for boys and coach? go to college and study business and be a CEO? Great. you should have a plan. <i>And</i> college is the best- at least one of the best- times of your life. you meet awesome people. Maybe the future Mrs. Beans ;)<br />
<br />
If you get another horrible teacher like me who writes your name down for not having a pencil or something like that, before you do your scowly face with your lips pouted out, I want you to think, "hey- is this teacher trying to hurt me in the long run or help me?" Most teachers don't secretly hate kids (although my 4th grade teacher, Ms. Mullens, might have). Most do this under-appreciated, under-paying, overly stressful job because we love students and want to influence lives. I wish you all the best Antwan.<br />
<br />
love, mrs. smithfreesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-50900593686146439202014-05-20T21:10:00.000-07:002014-05-20T21:10:18.540-07:00letters to my studentsdear cristobal,<br />
<br />
i actually just shook my head as soon as i wrote your name. i want to kick you for wasting so much of your potential this year. but i have a feeling i will get payback next year when you come crawling back asking for help with stuff that you have to do at christian brothers. that is, if they still let you in ;)<br />
<br />
seriously though, thank you for the times you did work hard in my class. you are extremely intelligent, and i'm sorry i couldn't spend more time differentiating so that you could be more challenged. however, you could have improved in grammar and writing, and on informational text like newsela. but that will come later.<br />
<br />
i hope you really do have a successful time in high school and get to go to a really great college. i think if you work hard and challenge yourself, you'll be more interested than always being so aloof. i hope you find a career that is exciting and challenging.<br />
<br />
it has been an honor to teach you this year- you always challenged me. come back and visit once in a while, too.<br />
<br />
love, mrs. smithfreesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-36963669711442796562014-05-18T18:07:00.001-07:002014-05-18T18:07:45.914-07:00letters to my studentsdear juana,<br />
<br />
i think you are one of those students i will never forget, even if i teach for thirty years. i have seen you overcome so much this year. you were sassy and feisty when you got to me, and then i was worried that after the homeroom switch, you'd get so frustrated and overwhelmed that you'd give up and just stop trying.<br />
<br />
but then something magical happened- you matured. you took all that anger at the injustice of what happened and you determined to get out of that situation next year. you worked all the harder (and you were already working hard) and you ignored the people trying to hold you back, and you got fierce. focused. and you succeeded.<br />
<br />
your test scores are averaging my high class. you overcame. and it has been the most amazing thing to watch. i'm sure you'd go back and change it, but i think you ended up growing more this year than you ever would have if the homerooms stayed.<br />
<br />
and so for that i am thankful. there is a saying that you don't truly know someone until a trial hits them- you don't see their true character. my dear, you are a diamond. i'd take a hundred of you every year if i could over kids who were already ahead of you. because now nothing can stop you. the world will one day see what i see now, and i'm so thankful i got a sneak peek.<br />
<br />
i am so happy to let you go conquer the world, but boy will i miss you next year.<br />
<br />
love,<br />
mrs. smithfreesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-85438379025943678172014-04-24T19:36:00.002-07:002014-04-24T19:36:48.929-07:00seeming and beingthis is the longest week in the life of a teacher. the week right before state tests. i am averaging 12 hour days, and if someone brings up something from a conversation two days ago, i have a hard time recalling it.<br />
<br />
today was also one of those days where i got nothing done afterschool for a long time because my door was open and kids just keep drifting in and out to say hi, to ask their grade (you'll know on your progress report next week), to ask for make up work, to say hi again, to ask to use my phone, to ask if i have food, to say hi (again), to try and ask the story behind the framed dollar on my wall (more on that later), to show me their soccer-ball-kicking skills.....<br />
<br />
i did eventually get annoyed enough to kick them out, but since i am down to four weeks left with them, i savor these moments. yesterday i was just watching my second block class work silently and intently, and i thought 'i may never have a class like this again.' it feels like teaching high school again with that class; they are my 'highest' class according to reading comprehension, but i really think it is just that they have done the work to get somewhere and that takes maturity. so they are more mature- they follow rules not because they love rules or want to please me, but because they know that's just how the world works. they are freaking hilarious because they understand sarcasm, subtlety and innuendo. (cause in point: last week we were reviewing pronoun-antecedent agreement, and i was explaining the correct answer without really having read it so i kept saying 'it is he'she because blah blah blah' and i could tell they were giggling and trying to tell me something but i shushed them. then i looked up. the sentence ended with 'if they learn to do him/her correctly.' (it should have been 'it'). I said 'oh- nope that should be it- that would be awkward' class: that WAS awkward!")<br />
<br />
i digress. this week we are supposed to get lists of kids who may fail for the year and have to take summer school. one girl, brianna, was hanging out to see what work she was missing and to see if she was on the list. brianna really confuses me as a teacher. she can read better than everyone else in her class (she is in my low class, where the average reading level is about 4th grade), but for some reason she performs very poorly on tests. She doesn't do homework, but then she can get stuff pretty quickly in class. She is always talking to teachers after school and says she knows she needs to work harder and do homework, but so far this year has not changed any habits. but what is really great about her as a person is that she is so genuine and vulnerable. she is always smiling, but then she can have this dreamlike, zoned-out air sometimes too. i just can't figure her out. but today after spending a good hour in my room, studying for a test, taking it, grading it, and then talking about her chances of passing the 8th grade, she asked me to write a note to her mom to say where she was. i try to speak/write in spanish so i wrote part of it in spanish. then i asked her 'how do i say, 'i believe in you' 'yo creo en ti'. So when she walked out the door, i said 'yo creo en ti!' and she stopped and turned and looked at me- getting really quiet and serious. 'thank you for everything you've done for me this year mrs. smith. thank you for always being there for me.'<br />
<br />
always. i have only known her for 8 months. she has hung out with me after school maybe ten or twelve days. i constantly chastise her for not doing her work and tell her she can do so much better. but i haven't 'always been there for' her. it really humbled me, and i realized that in her thirteen years, a year is a really long time. and that when she looks back at eighth grade, she will probably remember coming to my class after school. that fondness and encouragement in tiny spoonfuls will seem much bigger than they really are in her mind. i am the benefactor of my students' misshapen reality.freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-61584092181516510582014-03-05T20:08:00.003-08:002014-03-05T20:08:44.568-08:00ashestonight i went to an ash wednesday service. i mostly went because i felt obligated, but like most things that i think will be burdens, it ended up being exactly what my soul needed.<br />
<br />
the worship. the drum-crashing, vibrato-voiced, intensely indy rock updated hymns that had a build and a fade crashed over me like waves in an ocean. my little white soul pines for rock based worship music here in dixie.<br />
<br />
the dim lights. not a cell phone buzzed the entire time. ambiance is not everything, but it is something.<br />
<br />
the familiar faces. so many close friends and dear people, whom three years ago i didn't know existed, and now can't imagine life without.<br />
<br />
repentance.<br />
<br />
repentance. i almost think i just need an ash wednesday service every week. more than a sunday service. i was in the right place for it- already overwhelmed by my mouth's ability to pierce and sting, my mind's stumbling behind, always too late to stop the words from spilling over.<br />
<br />
the Truth. in song, in word, in embraces and tears.<br />
<br />
old wounds that never seem to heal. that sounds cryptic. one pastor mentioned trials, and as an example, miscarriages. most days i hear that word and nod silently and move on. tonight it ripped me apart. someone is Home ahead of us. i couldn't help wondering if God mercifully saved him or her from the pain of my words and flaws, but i know He is just merciful, and that we all sin more than we know. five years is a long time, and yet i ached to hear all the cries and hushed questions of tiny ones all around me. i don't usually think things like this, which probably made it all the more painful. five years of being with a Savior. i envied my child, sinless and in glory already. and in a flash of this short life, i will be there too. that's who i am most anxious to meet.<br />
<br />
<br />
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
i have not cried like that in a while. it was so freeing. tears rolling down my cheeks and a huge sigh breathed. </div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
<br /></div>
<div style="margin-bottom: 0px; margin-left: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-top: 0px;">
the hope. flesh is time-bound and of the earth. my name means earth and it is fitting and also a constant reminder that my weakness is only for here. </div>
<br />
<br />
the slowness. it takes a long time to get hundreds of people in lines through a communion spread. there is no hurrying. most of my life i try to hurry. you just sing or listen to the music or watch the people near you. and step. and step. and step.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-16417012514129177352014-03-02T14:31:00.001-08:002014-03-02T14:31:12.290-08:00never let me go(the soundtrack for this post is Ceremonials by Florence and the Machine)<br />
<br />
<br />
I have discovered something recently. Almost as an accident, and mostly because it annoys my husband.<br />
<br />
I see literary elements. I see them everywhere.<br />
<br />
I'm watching an episode of <i>The Wonder Years</i> and then - what was that?- a haunting half-invisible theme drifts across a typically saccharine coming-of-age story.<br />
<br />
<br />
Becoming a teacher of literature has honed my skills far more than an addiction to reading all through my childhood or even years of reading great books as an English major. To see something is one thing; to make someone else see it is wholly other.<br />
<br />
I have been toying with the idea of reading the bible for literary elements, too. Not a 'bible as literature' humanistic thing, but more as a way to see how genius God is. Because surely if we mere humans, which includes the likes of Kazuo Ishiguro, Cormac McCarthy, and John Steinbeck, can slay each other with heart-wrenching stories of love, betrayal, loneliness and aching, then surely, surely, the author of the authors can do it. and better.<br />
<br />
And so I find myself once again in kings and chronicles. I love these books so much because they read like great literature already- and prove that no one has an 'in' with God. One of my favourite stories of all is in 1 kings 13. Let me give you a summary: There is an evil, wicked king. I mean bad. So bad that for decades afterward, if you wanted to describe someone else as horrid, you said they were like this guy. Anyway, he goes and breaks the law by creating a new altar and some false gods. So God sends a prophet to tell him 'hey, you're gonna die- stop doing this.' King Evil gets so mad, he just sticks out his hand to yell at this prophet, but then his hand shrivels immediately. Suddenly he is contrite and full of forgiveness. Still, God says he has to go. Evil invites prophet to his house for dinner and drinks, but prophet says, 'no way! God told me not to eat with you- I can't even go back the way I came!' So he leaves. On his way home, he encounters another prophet. This other prophet invites him over, too, and he declines politely. But then the prophet says 'Oh- God TOLD me to ask you,' so then he goes home with him and eats. Of course, prophet 2 was lying (why? and why isn't he ever punished? we never find out - apparently not the important part. That's what I would tell my kids- he is a static character, and we never see the end of his story, so you know the theme is not 'what goes around comes around'), and then he has the audacity to TELL prophet 1 that he was disobedient and will die on the way home. Sure enough, after dinner, prophet 2 heads out and WHAM! gets killed by a lion.<br />
<br />
crazy, right?<br />
<br />
The really crazy part is that then prophet 2 feels real bad, gets his sons to saddle up the donkey, goes and finds the body, takes it home, MOURNS him, buries him in his own tomb, and tells his sons what a great man he was and that his prophecy about king super evil will come true.<br />
<br />
ok, now it's time for the quiz: what is the moral or theme of the story?<br />
<br />
Never, ever, listen to someone who says, 'God told me...' ?<br />
Stick to your gut- or lions will tear them out?<br />
Don't believe someone, even a 'holy' someone, if what they say is contradicting what you know you should do?<br />
<br />
I am not entirely sure. I feel very far from ancient near eastern culture, and parts of the old testament really stump me.<br />
<br />
But that got me thinking (that and one of the hardest weeks of teaching this year): what are my themes? What would I try to write, through narrative, if I were an author?<br />
<br />
I have things I try to narrate to my students all year long, but I rarely get to prove that they are true.<br />
Hard work pays off (I use that as my attention-getter in class).<br />
Taking shortcuts is rarely worth it in the long run.<br />
If you have the time to copy, you have the time to do it on your own, and <i>learn </i>it.<br />
Being mean is not cool, and will make you a sad, lonely person in the end.<br />
<br />
My confidence is that maybe later in life they will hear an echo of my voice when someone else tells them that, or that they will trust and avoid the trouble altogether.<br />
<br />
And then I think "What about life?" What would I write if I were trying to tell humanity about what I believe is true about God, life, love, fulfillment, revenge....<br />
<br />
I would like to say that hard work does pay off and that your dreams will come true if you stick with them. But then I see my husband- he works harder at pursuing his dreams of music than anyone I know, and is met with a big Universal cricket chirping. He just said, "I am utterly ignorable." It seems true. If you look at his life so far, you'd probably say, 'dude, pick another dream.' But he can't. It is IN him to write songs, to play, to help people worship and to think deeply about those things. It has been a long, long past three years, and now that we have uprooted ourselves to pursue my dream, we are left realizing he is where I was three years ago. And not that he was absolutely fulfilled back home. It depends how you define success, but by most definitions, he was not successful. He did realize this: he loves to teach others about music and worship. He had a small, tightly-knit worship team and that is what he longs for again. And here we are, in Rock n' Roll's birth city, and spencer is withering. That sounds dramatic, but that is the word we both used this weekend while talking about it. Withering is a slow process, often visible.<br />
<br />
I've come to realize the value and place of work (you can call it ministry, calling, whatever). Having a purpose in life for which you were uniquely made. I am going to lay aside the entire argument for or against this, and what exactly it can be, for my purpose here. Without something meaningful to do each day, people slowly wither. It could be the homeless man you see at the same corner on your way to Target. No matter what he has done to get there, he needs something to <i>do</i>; he doesn't need money. The retired person, or widowed wife, who sits at home most afternoons, no one to clean up after, no one to share her wisdom with, no one asking for help. It is a crazy thought for a hard-working, youthful, self-reliant person such as myself, but it's dawned on me recently that asking for help is a <i>blessing</i> to people. It humbles me and it gives them a chance to make someone's day better with their own talents and experiences.<br />
<br />
At this point, you're probably thinking, 'what is the theme of your post, tara?'<br />
<br />
I admit, I started writing this Friday afternoon. It is now Sunday afternoon. I hesitated writing about spencer, because it seems so personal. I don't want people thinking he is sitting here moping about. I would say his life mirrors nature. He is in a winter stage. I read in a gardening book recently that winter is actually necessary- it kills fungi and helps things get ready to bloom in the spring. Much is going on beneath the surface. Spencer's days are filled with his own projects and ideas- and that is only in the past year, once I started making a teacher's salary. He writes, he sings, he records, he researches, he designs. I cannot imagine Someone who created him will let that all go to nothing. I think the world needs what spencer has made, just like my 8th graders need me (but never as much as I need them).<br />
<br />
What I hope and pray are themes in spencer's life are: waiting, trust, instant success is rarely good for someone, trials and disappointments show you yourself and what is truly important, and that there is an Author who is up there writing and designing, and all this is not random. <br />
<br />
From what I've seen in life so far, these things are true, so I wait and hope and trust.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-338279453199689492014-01-09T19:26:00.000-08:002014-01-09T19:26:54.982-08:00Write this day down.Today after school, I walked back upstairs to my classroom and thought, "Is it already 2:15?"<br />
Immediately after that, I thought, "What did I just think?"<br />
<br />
I know it is only the second day back but I also thought, as I pulled out of the parking lot after tutoring, "How many weeks do I have left with my kids this year? Seventeen!" I love these kids so much. Yesterday I told someone I felt drunk on middle schoolers. A kid was walking to lunch wearing gloves for some reason and was bebopping along to his own little tune. He wasn't doing it for attention or to break the rules, but just because he was fascinated with how his hands looked doing dance moves in gloves. A few more years and the voice in his head will keep him from doing a hallway dance. There is something magical about adolescence. I am so thankful that this year I have planned enough ahead and have been humbled enough to not be about kids obeying me that I can walk around and see these little fleeting moments. I hope when they go home, their parents can see through all the busyness of feeding, disciplining and arguing with them to see these moments too. While I am sad to lose them in a few short months, I can't imagine what it is like to love and watch someone for 18 years and then let them go. I am thankful I only endure a one-year love affair and heartbreak. I couldn't handle 18.<br />
<br />
My last class of the day, like many a teacher out there I'll bet, is the one I have to mentally prepare myself for. It could be that they are going stir-crazy. It could be that their diet of fruit punch and hot cheetos has taken them from sugar high to carb crash. Or it could be that by the 6th straight hour of following the insanely strict rules they have to follow each day, rebellion sets in and they just can't take it anymore. They are also my lowest class. Meaning that the kids have been leveled by their reading scores and are now in three distinct classes. This sounds awful, but it really for the most part is better, because I used to have a girl who reads at a college freshman level in the same class with a few who read at a 3rd grade level, and I just couldn't reach them both where they were at. This class also has 30 kids in it instead of 22 or 20 like my other classes, which makes it tougher to reach kids who are behind. All that along with the last class of the day syndrome makes it a battle of patience which leaves me exhausted every day.<br />
But yesterday and today were so great. I don't want to think that it will always be like this, but they seemed genuinely happy to see me again after Christmas break. I also had a really fun day with them yesterday doing an activity that was challenging but fun and got them discussing grammar with each other while I just walked around taking pictures with my phone. (They now say, "Ugh! She's taking pictures again!" which means they know I am obsessed with them and that I am consistently interested. win.) Within the first five minutes of class, one of my favourites was making 'pssst' noises to his neighbor and mid sentence I just said, "Emanuel- stop 'psssting' Bruce" "How'd you know it was me????" His eyes all wide. Me frowning. Then smiling. "Oh I missed you guys!" There is so much personality in that room it is about to burst, but I am learning to ride it. Like bodysurfing. You can get crushed or you can wait and watch and then stay afloat on top of all the giggles, sideways glances, outbursts, and jokes and use the momentum to get somewhere.<br />
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Today we were reading about Urbee, a car made by being 3-D printed. I had also seen something on Sunday Morning about printing body parts - ears in particular. So I told them that. Then I said that I had also seen scientists grow ears on rats. The students' eyes got huge. Edgar says "ewww! I do not want to see that!" So of course I have to stop the powerpoint and google 'rats growing ears'. Disgust is possibly the most engaging emotion for a lesson. Anyway, the Urbee also runs on ethanol, which is corn fuel I explain. We keep reading and talking about main ideas and then one kids looks at me and says, "Do you just put the corn in the car?" It took me a minute to figure out he was still back on how a car could possibly run on corn. I said no, they make an alcohol out of it by probably boiling and then fermenting it (thank you, trip to the bourbon trail). Then we talked about the cost and would they spend $16,000 to buy that car. Several said they would. I said no because if a semi hit you, you'd be a skittle. One of my students then says, very inarticulately, that that is why you should get it for $16,000. me: You should buy it because you will die?" He tries to explain again, a little more clearly. Me: "Oh you mean you think they priced it that way on purpose because they knew that if it were $30,000 and that small and dangerous, no one would buy it?" "Yes!" I was floored. This boy had failed 7th grade and then by some process of paperwork was moved straight to 8th grade. He has an IEP which means he has a learning disability. He spends a lot of time down in the office for various behavior problems. And yet, he was the only student who spliced those two ideas together and thought about the thought process of the creators of the car and price points v. consumer fears. It was such a sophisticated thought, but even I mistook it at first for complete gobbledy gook because he is not good at explaining his thoughts. I was so humbled and thankful that I took the time to be uncomfortable and ask him again what he meant rather than just get embarrassed for him, and quickly change the subject.<br />
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I could go on all night, but you can guess where I am going. MY KIDS ARE SMART. and I am overwhelmed by the fact that I have to try and keep up with them and teach them, when in reality they teach me so much every single day. It is me who is seeing new things and being challenged.freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-79195421049505806022014-01-03T12:25:00.000-08:002014-01-03T12:31:07.148-08:00HunkeringThe temperature is currently hovering somewhere around freezing, and in two days the low will get into single digits and we might get some snow! This born and bred desert girl is loving this weather. We have not travelled for any breaks this school year so far, so fall felt like fall, Thanksgiving felt like chilly November weather surrounded by colourful leaves, and Christmas felt like Christmas. There was also the crazy cold snap of early December when my parents were visiting and the car heater was broken. Nothing like a string of windy cold days to make you suddenly feel warm in 50 degree weather. And thankful for the sun. I don't think I've ever been thankful for the sun.<br />
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I have also purchased cold weather pants for running and a really cool looking cold-weather jacket, complete with ceramic thread to hold in body heat- which is on its (non-drone-delivered) way from amazon. At least I will look the part of a cold-weather jogger. Actually, I have been running more lately, with sentences like this coming out of my mouth: "my lungs only burn for the first mile" "after three miles, I was actually hot" and "the good thing about the cold is it makes your face go numb and then you're fine". </div>
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Lest you think I am some sort of winter Olympian, let me confess I have spent the better part of this break on the couch in the den, covered in quilts, blankets, a hat and slippers and the space heater when spencer will let me have it. We live in a 70-year-old house, a house with a crawl-space and poor insulation. Not such a treat in winter. I am actually starting to get sick of sitting, but it's been nice to do close to nothing for two weeks. And until yesterday, i didn't check my work email or do anything school related. That was a milestone to hit. The last two Christmas breaks have been mostly me planning for January, which is not relaxing at all. This year, because I work with the fantastic Hayley Moore, we coplanned a writing unit and even made copies for the first week back so that we'd do nothing over break. This year has had several things that made me think, "Ok, I can teach as a career. This is manageable." I am excited for this spring semester: Our writing unit, then Anne Frank/Number the Stars and a propaganda unit, then a research project based on the book Flesh and Blood So Cheap which is about laborers around the world. Hayley and I even get to co-lead an mtr graduate workshop in March, which feels insane since we are only second year teachers. I miss my kids and have wondered several times over break what they are up to. This group of kids is so sweet and great, I am really sad that I am halfway done with them. </div>
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That reminds me- about a week ago I had a dream that it was the first day of school next year and the kids were being so unruly. We were outside walking into the classrooms and they were climbing fences to try and escape. I was yelling for Austin, my coworker who teaches math to my kids, to grab them and I remember seeing the rest of my 8th grade team all frazzled as well. Then I saw kids from last year- not this year, but last year which nearly killed me- and I was SO HAPPY because in comparison they were angels. I hugged them and told them how great they were. I am not really dreading next year, I think maybe my brain just loves these current kids so much that I don't want my time to go too fast with them. I'm sure I will love next year's kids as much, because last year I thought I couldn't love this year's kids nearly as much as my first year. But I have to say, I do. And as a whole, they are more of a joy to work with and be around because they are so kind, hard-working and more respectful on the whole than last year's kids.</div>
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This post is long and rambling now. Kind of like my internet perusals of late. I wanted to write about New Year's resolutions, because I am an incurable goal-setter and I like the idea of fresh starts. I actually test-drove my resolutions in December to see how realistic they were. What I've decided to do is to ADD things that I want to do or have be patterns without taking anything away (yet) or trying to just stop doing or start doing something drastic. So, my goals are: read my Bible and pray each day, do something active every day (could be cleaning or a walk around the neighborhood), drink 8 glasses of water, get 8 hours of sleep (this one will be tough when school starts again since I get up at 5:20), and eat 7 servings of fruit and veggies a day. That last one is really hard. I feel like I am a pretty healthy eater, but I really don't eat enough fruits and veggies. And I am trying to find more things for school lunch that are in that category and that I can make ahead. So far, I am doing pretty well. The other part of this year's resolution idea was to not say that I will do 100% every day. Of course not. But to aim for that, so that in a year, these things are more patterns and habits than they are right now. </div>
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What about you? Do you make New Year's resolutions? Are you avidly against them because no one keeps them? What do you wish were more of a pattern in your life?</div>
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freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-50700682021755667072013-12-11T18:28:00.001-08:002013-12-11T18:28:32.903-08:00somedays, I am a jerk. I teach middle school, so temptation to be frustrated is par for the course. However, most times I manage to <i>think</i> the evil thoughts I have toward certain students, or a whole class in general. If I remember to not take things personally, not let a kid get to me, not let my emotions get in the way of discipline, things go better. The kids realize that I am an adult who cannot be sucked into their angsty moods. They realize I do what I say I will do, and that this makes for a safer classroom. The issue melts away and we go on with our lesson. But today I failed at all of that.<br />
I was a jerk.<br />
Out loud.<br />
<br />
I got really frustrated at my last class. I finally lost it and growled "You guys are really <i>annoying</i> me right now." A kid who was more or less the target of that comment looked at me with shock. It's not that I never preach at them. Or get angry at their immaturity. But I haven't yet this year said something like that. Like as a human I just didn't want to be around them anymore. And although I am currently taking antibiotics because I have some sort of bacterial infection which is making swallowing soup feel like swallowing razors, I know that wasn't ok. I feel like a jerk. Like I lost a lot of ground. Because my biggest rule is "Respect all nouns." I did not respect them. I let minor things like a sore throat and end of semester stress undo four months of careful discipline and morale-building. I don't want to be their favourite teacher, but I do want to be a role model. I want to be patient and kind and what I always preach at them to be.<br />
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My consolation is that recently I prayed for humility. The past week has been answer after answer to that prayer. And that my best friend, who now has a baby and a two-year-old, just told me the other day that sometimes her kids bug her so much she has to try really hard not to be mean to them. So apparently, even your own flesh and blood make you feel like that. I admired her courage to admit that, because I haven't heard many moms admit that. It is hard to admit that I can be a really unloving, selfish person and that most days I just cover it up. Why am I surprised? My pastor keeps saying "your sin is so much worse than you could ever imagine, but you are so much more loved than you could ever dream." I shouldn't be surprised at my own sin by now, but I am. Because I'd like to think I am not that bad of a person. But I am. And even at this moment, I still wish about three of my really annoying kids would just not come back after Christmas. God, give me grace to love them. I have no love for them. I am done. There are 7 days left this semester, and I am worn out. And I still have to grade a stack of papers and write 3 unit plans before the 20th. I have no strength. Thank you for the reminder of my weakness and please help me to pray (internally, since pray is not allowed in schools) instead of losing it tomorrow.<br />
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<br />freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-40390954411923971912013-10-05T12:59:00.000-07:002013-10-05T12:59:49.605-07:00fall break<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Today is the start of a 9 day break. We didn't have this last year- just a long weekend.<br />
Spencer and I really wanted to go to Boston, but despite searching for airfare for months, we just couldn't sink $1500 into another vacation right now. So we are staying put. I am relieved, actually. Although I woke up this morning with a pang of travel yearning, I need this break. I slept for twelve hours last night (which is not unusual at the end of a week spent dealing with thirteen year olds and the bureaucratic crap that comes with working in a giant school district) and I still feel sluggish this morning. I am really hoping to make this 9 day break a recharge. In lieu of a well-written post, I will just write these goals as a list - and this is mostly for myself, for accountability.<br />
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I want to<br />
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-sleep 8 hours a day<br />
-watch Conan when it is actually on and not online the next day<br />
-be outside every day<br />
-workout every day, even if it is just a walk with spencer<br />
-eat better- more fruits and veggies, fewer junk food items<br />
-read almost all of <i>Never Let Me Go</i><br />
-which means finishing my current book, <i>One Gallant Rush</i><br />
-read blogs and find new blogs<br />
-FINALLY use my meat grinder attachment for our kitchenaid to create meatloaf!<br />
-go to Iris<br />
-make my final payment on my student loans (!!!)<br />
-ichat with family a LOT<br />
-create a bday present for Adella, instead of just buying something<br />
-read my Bible (the fact that this is this far down my list shows just how off-kilter my priorities are)<br />
-pray for other people<br />
-ditch church<br />
-watch every minute of Sunday Morning instead of multi-tasking, just because I can<br />
-go to open houses with spencer<br />
-go to the movies with spencer<br />
-go to at least one other good restaurant with spencer<br />
-get our knives sharpened (for the first time in 6 years)<br />
-waste 3 hours looking through my basket of old pictures from high school and college (the best of which will make it into another blog post)<br />
-frame the wine map poster spencer bought me for my birthday<br />
-watch all of season 8 of How I Met Your Mother on netflix<br />
-get my new iphone and learn to use it<br />
-(not because I want to) plan for next week (but I know once I start, I will love it)<br />
-(not because I want to, and it might get pushed back til next monday) finish putting grades in<br />
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<br />freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-50765560541335222422013-09-19T18:04:00.001-07:002013-09-19T18:04:46.509-07:00este ano no esta perfecto, pero esta mucho mejor!Today we had parent teacher conferences. I think every night this week has been a 'get home and hope there is a spot left in the parking garage' kinda night. Tomorrow I won't get home 'til 9 but I'm really excited to go to the Memphis Conference- first annual MTR sponsored conference about education here in the bluff city. I also get to lead a small PD tomorrow- not because I'm awesome, but because I went to the training in the summer and now other English teachers need to know. It's on Common Core and I am SUPER stoked that Hayley and I will actually be teaching it all to our kids in the next two weeks!<br />
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I want to blog more this year. I just have to say that the fact that I am currently blogging and that I feel really well-rested and invigorated and happy on a Thursday night is proof of my title for this post. Every night I want to work more and every morning I am excited for what the day holds. There is a general peace and joy that have NEVER characterized me before. If for nothing else, I want to blog to record the daily blessings.<br />
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Here are a few:<br />
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Today we watched the movie The Outsiders because we finished reading the book. On time. It is the end of week 7 and we have read an entire novel (in class- all reading is done in our 90 minutes a day), taught the kids how to answer questions using textual evidence not their opinions, and how to write a narrative essay.<br />
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This is its own thing: OUR KIDS CAN USE AND EXPLAIN THE COMMON CORE RUBRIC FOR GRADING THEIR ESSAYS! They have written two essays and peer-edited mine and their own. One day this week, a student said "Mrs. Smith- it's only September- WHY are we already writing an essay?" And I had just been thinking, "It's ONLY September and we are already writing a timed essay!!!!" AND grading it.<br />
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Tonight we had parent-teacher conferences and I spoke more Spanish than I've ever spoken. IT WAS TERRIBLE AND JAGGEDY AND UGLY. The parents are very gracious with me. But I communicated in another language! Not since Prague have I felt this invigorated. I can do this!<br />
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My students have a 70% homework completion rate. This sounds awful. Last year, I think they averaged 30%. They are working really hard. and it is paying off.<br />
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Which brings me to this- my last one for the day. My 'attention getter' is that I yell "HARD WORK" and they yell "PAYS OFF!" and then look at me. The other day, their social studies teacher said he was telling them the values of the Puritans and one was "hard work" and they all automatically said "pays off!"<br />
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heeheheh I am in their heads....<br />
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<br />freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-91104756299921972013-09-14T07:20:00.002-07:002013-09-14T07:21:42.157-07:00Merci, beaucoup!This is LONG overdue, but here are pictures of my kids reading their BRAND NEW LEVELED BOOKS! Thank you sponsors!!!!<br />
This is my enrichment class and they read every day after lunch for about twenty minutes and then write about what they read in their journals. Summarizing is a vital skill for all of English and other subjects, too. They are sitting in rows by reading level and as of a few days ago (about a week and a half into the book), they were reading at the same pace in their rows. This tells me (without technical data like an SRI or DRA reading test) that they are reading at their level and keeping up with their group. I will have them discuss the book with their group soon. Hooray for books!!!! Thank you so much!<br />
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love, 8th grade KMS falcons and Mrs. Smith<br />
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freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-18272766371053468522013-06-17T12:55:00.004-07:002013-06-17T12:55:58.518-07:00holes in the fencethe summer i turned eight, my family moved to a new house. that was the 6th move in my life, and although i was pretty used to it, i think it was starting to take its toll on me emotionally. fortunately, this was going to be home for awhile, despite my parents' plans to only be there for a few years. unbeknownst to us, we had moved smack dab in the middle of a great block. there were so many kids (at one point i counted over 25) and what was especially great was that many of them went to the same church. this was 'the Plan' for our family, we just didn't know it yet. <div>
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the people catty-corner behind us were a young couple with a daughter about my age. she invited me to AWANA, probably because I was the only unsaved heathen person she had ever met, and 'bring an unchurched friend' was a requirement. phew! over the next few years, me, my dad, my mom and then jenny each heard the gospel and responded to it- something that now is extraordinary to me as I know many people still praying for family members after years and years. we were just ready I guess and God brought us to the right neighborhood, the right church and the right time in our lives to realize we needed His grace. </div>
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my friendship with Megan soon became more like a sisterhood (although she ended up having more in common with my sister jenny- both math geeks and more introverted) and after several summers of climbing over the cinderblock wall between our houses, the parents (who had also become good friends) decided for their sake to take down part of the fences and have a walk through. No more climbing and jumping down 6 feet in the pitch black summer darkness, or running with hands out in front in case of spiderwebs or bugs. and no more trips around the block for our parents after evenings of card playing, croquet, and janet's amazing desserts. we just walked through the fence. </div>
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somewhere along the line, a mailbox was put up for secret letters, but it eventually gathered more dust than mail as we grew up, went off to college, then moved across the country (megan and jenny), moved home (all of us), moved again (megan) or got married (me). our parents still walked through and had those card-playing, story-telling nights, and we did too whenever we were home. when jenny got engaged, she didn't want anything other than a backyard wedding at the butler's house, being escorted by my dad through the hole in the fence. It is my favourite wedding I've ever been to, and trust me, I've been to a few.</div>
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Two years ago, spencer and i moved to memphis so i could learn to be a teacher. i've done a lot of thinking and reflecting on my childhood- partly for class and partly because i think that's what you do when you have distance and time between you and something. clarity comes through. i know that although i was not poor like many of my students, i did have some things in common with them- moving frequently, not having great extended-family relationships, busy working parents and me and jenny being home alone a lot, etc. i realize that taking down the fence was a much bigger deal for janet and greg than it was for me. it meant that they were available nearly all the time to listen to and care for a young girl whose early years of being a christian were pretty tumultuous. they were steady and sure when sometimes nothing else was. they were always there. it is a huge sacrifice, i realize now, and i don't think i'll ever really know the impact they had on my life. </div>
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last summer, my parents moved, and it is one of the hardest things that has ever happened to me. I didn't know it would hit me like it did. I always wanted to move away, but I don't think i wanted them to. janet and greg have also bought another house- on the east coast near megan - and now since jenny and michael live there too, it is just like the whole little family is changing locations. that makes me happy because i don't think i ever could be ok with my parents not being near greg and janet. they are their closest family. still, the steps to moving have each been weighty and gut-wrenching. the day the tree came down that michael and jenny were married under, the day the fence was boarded up and then a new block wall was built. the day my parents left their house- leaving behind all the little hash marks in the water-heater closet that mark how jenny and i grew through the years. i still have dreams about it sometimes, and that might be the only way i see it for a while, because when spencer and i went home last Christmas, i couldn't bring myself to even drive by it. it is strange being so attached to one place when i always wanted to roam. </div>
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i tell you that long and sentimental story to say this- i want to be that to someone someday. in small ways, i want to put a hole in the fence for my kids- not that i can live next door to them and have them over all the time. teaching is two full time jobs put together. but i want to symbolically be someone who has time for them. i want to not just show up every day for work- though consistency is really, really important- but i want to somehow find two minutes between classes to listen, and to cry or laugh with them. as i've learned this year, test scores don't go up overnight, and i may never be that rockstar teacher who can get those kinds of scores, but i want someone to have some memories someday like i do- a little glimpse of green grass between a sliver of fences- a little sneak peak of Home.</div>
freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-5088766205345798652013-06-04T09:06:00.001-07:002013-06-04T09:06:10.491-07:00shameless plugOk people!<br />
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This is where I use my blog for my own (students') gain. I need your help!<br />
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In case you don't know, I teach 8th grade ELA (that is middle school speak for English Language Arts) at Kingsbury Middle School in Memphis, Tennessee. I love my job. I love my kids. I love to read. My kids, for the most part, do not love to read. Mostly because they have not done so for fun before and so it is a chore for them. Also, most of my students read 1-2 years below grade level (because English is their second language, because they do not have the support of books and parents who read a lot at home, or because of other responsibilities like work or watching younger siblings), so then reading feels HARD and boring. Some have come to the conclusion that they hate reading and writing. They LOVE science and are really good at it, and many love math or social studies. I think I may have heard two students say English was their favourite class. I love a good challenge though. I love to read and want to prove to them that they do, too, they just don't know it yet.<br />
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Part of the problem is not having books at their reading level. I came from teaching 11th and 12th grade the year before, and my own collection of books, along with a ton which were generously donated to me, were way too high for my kids to read. Also, I had one copy of each book, so they could never share what they were reading with their classmates.<br />
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<b><a href="http://mtrgive.org/campaigns/tara-smith/" target="_blank">My MTRGive project for this summer</a></b> is to get a leveled library. There is a description on the page, but basically I will buy 5 copies of each book at a variety of levels (4th-9th grade- I do have some students who are above grade level) and then have a structured silent reading time each week. Their 7th grade teachers have given me their reading levels so I can start the year knowing exactly what level book they need! I will assign books so that each student has 4 other companions reading the same book and they will be able to talk about it. I have chosen a variety of books that I hope will be interesting to boys and girls, history or science geeks as well as any potential English nerds. I would LOVE to have this ready to go by August 5th- our first day of school.<br />
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As a reward for your reading, you can watch my <b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RM8Cc008p8U" target="_blank">end of year video</a></b> to my class who just graduated. I love those kids to death.<br />
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Donations are tax deductible, but more importantly, you will be helping students learn to love reading, which will give them so much confidence and engagement in school.<br />
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* As a super extra nice favor, can anyone who loves me and has a blog or twitter account PRETTY PRETTY PLEASE repost this??? Thanks so much!<br />
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<br />freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-33012375329427629952013-03-31T14:48:00.000-07:002013-03-31T14:48:22.793-07:00memphis in the spring<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
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today is easter sunday. Or as my pastor back home always calls it, resurrection sunday. i have to say that since living in memphis, i have a greater appreciation for holidays because of seasons. i think that in many ways, my first year of teaching has mirrored the seasons of the school year; it started out green and full of life, then slowly withered and died, with things getting harder and harder and harder until i was pretty sure i'd be fired or let go by mtr any day. winter was cold and bleak, with bare branches and a low, grey sky. not getting worse per say, but definitely not getting better. i worked very, very hard from january until march to get my kids to know that i loved them, and to get my curriculum prepared each sunday so that i'd have some sanity and rest come mid-week. </div>
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i remember driving to work one morning near the end of february, and noticing the tiniest little buds on the branches of a tree. no green yet- not even a flower, but it was something. then i smiled and thought to myself, 'could this be the beginning of a new season in my class?' it was a full month later, however, that i had <i>that</i> moment. we were reading Anne Frank: The Diary of a Young Girl, and I had finally reached the point of "setting my kids free" to read silently and independently. Now, you may ask why that is such a big deal. I have every reading level from kindergarten to tenth grade, often in one class, so making an assignment where everyone can read and no one gets left behind is difficult. My kids had begged for weeks to read in groups, but my coach said I needed to get them to read independently before we could do that. this was day 2 of independent reading, and they had a page full of questions to answer as they read. it was my homeroom, a class with more personality than you can imagine, and i looked around and realized that every single student was reading intently, writing, and not looking around to see if everyone else was still working. they were INTO the book and doing the best they could because they knew it was due at the end of class. i stood in the corner of the room- not a single student even noticing that i was watching them- and as a huge smile crept onto my face i thought 'look at the calendar! mark this day down- march 21st!' it was the day they finally were bought in- they were driven, they were working hard, they trusted that i wasn't giving them crap to do and that i believed they could do it. </div>
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it was magical. </div>
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"this, this!" i thought, "is what i want to do." not call home, write referrals, preach at a kid for not having a pencil AGAIN, or grade abysmally low test scores. </div>
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not that everything is rosy. not every student is always working hard. their homework completion rate is terrible and i fear high school will murder them. but they are changing. they are pushing themselves harder than they have all year and now i just hope i can keep that momentum going into TCAP (our standardized tests) and our next unit: the taming of the shrew. </div>
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Shakespeare? with eighth graders? </div>
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why, of course. </div>
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<br />freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-46473441644456555372012-12-31T21:55:00.003-08:002012-12-31T21:55:24.991-08:00you can do anything for 89 daysi just decided to jump into this next semester of teaching with more of my old life- my personality, my support of friends back home (i had been on a facebook hiatus because i mainly used it to vent and that is no good), and also this blog. I love to write. journal, rather.<br />
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last semester was so hard I wonder and hope that nothing will ever be like it again. I feel a bit of a sense of dread, or weight at the very least, at the thought of going back. I am thankful that last year and summer were so good that I was nothing but pure excited to meet my kids. i realize by now i should recognize the feelings of fear, incompetency, and floundering that arise from being bad at your job, but for some reason I thought teaching would be different. I thought I would be innately good at it. and honestly, last year I was. I thought I was out of my league when I came here but after working very hard for the first semester (and then deciding to create very sure boundaries around my marriage and personal life), I had a great second semester. Not perfect- there were obstacles and hardships, the feeling of beating my head against a wall with admin and the broken system, but that was to be expected. I was good at my job, great at classroom management- I had so much fun, especially with my crazy third period class. I felt sure that though being a first year teacher would be hard, I was made for it. This last semester made me question that many times. I have not experienced in a long time the feeling of crippling fear and inadequacy that has plagued me off and on for the last two months.<br />
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But I don't want to dwell on that. In the midst of being extremely humbled and broken down, I can now say that I believe that I can't do anything on my own. If anything good happens with my kids in my class, it will be from God. If I can get through a day without losing my patience with them, and without letting them irritate me (because they just want to get to me sometimes), it is the hand of God. I cannot keep myself calm- I need the calm peace of God. I need, NEED the perspective that comes from soaking in the Truth of his Word, and the humility that comes from being on my face in prayer and admitting i have no good answers to the challenges I face.<br />
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I've been reading Ezra lately, and it is so encouraging- God can use anyone and anything to accomplish His purposes. He used Isaiah to prophesy 150 years ahead of time that His people would be freed from captivity. And He used two pagan kings who were the most powerful men of their time to not only allow those captives to go home, but to FORCE all others to help them with money under penalty of death. No one can stand in God's way. I need this reminder. Yes, I am small and helpless, in fact I often do more harm than good. But I am His workmanship, created for good works, and He will accomplish what concerns me.<br />
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<br />freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-70024745192245287522012-05-07T13:57:00.004-07:002012-05-07T13:58:07.994-07:00summer reading list<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">i know it is ambitious, but since i have just about survived the most insane year of my life, i think i can handle a chunky reading list this summer... in between lying by a pool with rebecca and baby rhodes, planning for next year with hayley, going to california for a month, and, of course, watching all six seasons of The Wonder Years, I hope to move the following off of my bedside table:</span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">how to read literature like a professor. my mentor assigns this for ap lit summer reading and it is amazing. how was i an english major without reading this? seriously, every rain scene in every movie since i skimmed this book has hit me like a bolt of lightning. </span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">never let me go by kazuo ishiguro. a modern frankenstein. recommended by another ap teacher (and 'mentor' in my head). she teaches ap lang by having students read a classic and then read a modern version and compare the two. see also Moby Duck. </span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">the other wes moore by wes moore. a boy from the projects in baltimore grows up to become a rhodes scholar and finds out another boy with the same name from the same 'hood is in prison for attempted murder. the tagline reads: " The chilling truth is that his story could have been mine. The tragedy is that my story could have been his." because I just haven't gotten enough urban ed this year...</span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">voices from Chernobyl: the oral history of a nuclear disaster. I didn't realize how cheery my list was. my sister bought me this for my birthday a few years back and I am about halfway through. i am really in a nonfiction rut lately and i love it, even if the first chapter left me in a funk for a few days. </span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">cormac mcCarthy is my new favourite author. new as in I am adding him to my list of favourites. also new because for some reason I have been living under a rock and have not read him before. (i know!) the sparse syntax and freedom with punctuation (freedom from?) mirror the rugged western setting and makes me long for home. </span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">glory: one gallant rush. this is the book on which the movie is based. i also hate to admit i just saw the movie a few years ago and then spencer got me the book a year later for my birthday. sooooo good. i can't use too many 'o's on that one. if you feel the need for a good, long cry, watch it. (not sure if the book will make me cry- will let you know)</span></span></div>
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue', Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-size: small;">this one is a reread so i can see if i will teach it next year to my 8th graders. i am a big fan of latino literature- love in the time of cholera, like water for chocolate, etc. exposed to it at an early age, i didn't realize magic realism was a thing until later. it just seemed like people really do burst into flames or cook their emotions into their food. again, probably missing home, latin culture just feels normal to me, and i am excited to find new favourites since half my kids will be hispanic next year!</span></span></div>
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<br />freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-3109313516171764982011-11-08T19:57:00.001-08:002011-11-08T19:57:49.335-08:00children's literature: an annotated bibliography<div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Kites Sail High</i> by Ruth Heller</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">This is an excellent book which illustrates verbs for students. Don't be deceived! It looks like a children's book, but covers topics such as subjunctive mood, passive and active voice, and auxiliaries. Heller has a series covering parts of speech, each illustrated with beautiful colored pencil drawings. Elementary children would undoubtedly listen to these over and over while junior or senior high school students digest the intricacies of parts of speech in a candy-coated shell. Beyond the obvious instruction for verbs, you could also use this book to teach the difference between “vivid” verbs and the typical be verbs which fill student writing. After reading, have the students create their own list of vivid verbs and practice using them in sentences without be verbs. Another topic for discussion could be syntax. One page reads “Or it gives a command. March! This is a whole sentence in one single word, and of course this can only be done by a verb.” Why is a verb the only part of speech that can be a whole sentence? How else can we write besides using simple subject-verb with a period at the end? An easy way to introduce grammar is always a handy tool for the English teacher's belt, and this series is one of them.</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>John, Paul, George & Ben</i> by Lane Smith</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">Lane Smith, of <i>The Stinky Cheese Man</i> and <i>The True Story of the Three Little Pigs</i> fame, is great at humor and point of view. She doesn't talk down to children; her books read like she has an inside joke with them. John, Paul, George & Ben is a based-on-the-truth look into some of our founding fathers. It distills each man down to his essential quality and then goes back to when he was a child and shows how that trait set him apart. Each quality seemed to be a negative quality at first but fast-forward to the Revolutionary War, and each man's character plays a central role in the shaping of America. This book can obviously tie to history, becoming a cross-content review or introduction to a unit set in the late eighteenth century. It can also be used as key to unlock characterization. What are the major character traits of each man and how did those affect his life and those around him? After going through this short exercise, one could tackle a much more daunting work, like a novel or play. What are Willy Loman's and his two sons' essential qualities if you boil them down? What about Hamlet or Romeo? Why does Gatsby seem bound to a tragic end based on his character? Why stop there? Lead right into an essential question like “Do humans have a choice or does Fate determine their destiny?” The possibilities are endless.</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>The Little Prince</i> by Antoine de Saint-Exupery</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">This timeless classic has so many potential uses, and is loved by everyone who reads it. It is the story, “narrated” by a pilot who crashes in the deserts of Africa, of a little prince, visitor from another planet (Asteroid B-612), who is exploring the universe. He has a tidbit of wisdom from every encounter which he innocently shares by way of observation. He is always longing to return home, where a beautiful rose is waiting for him; a rose that cannot survive without him and to whom he is bound even though she is haughty and seems indifferent to his patient care. A few of the themes covered are: love, friendship, loyalty, childhood versus adulthood, and admirable character qualities like being hardworking and dedicated. In the secondary English classroom, a certain chapter could be read, such as when the little prince encounters a businessman who is obsessed with numbers, money and ownership, but who never gets up from his desk to enjoy anything he owns. The little prince is intrigued by this, which could be contrasted to Holden Caulfield from The Catcher in the Rye, who is disdainful toward adults and phonies. It could also be read as a whole, a little each day, just to instill a love of reading in students who do not habitually read. It is hard to imagine a person who would not be touched by this simple story, and it is short enough to read a small piece each day, or a larger chunk on Fridays, and finish in a quarter. So many sentences of Saint-Exupery's works have become well-known quotes about the deep themes of life, which could be discussed or used as journal prompts for reflection because they are universal. </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Where the Sidewalk Ends</i> by Shel Silverstein </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">Though most would cite The Giving Tree as their favorite Silverstein work, I am a lifelong fan of his poetry. I really believe most of them are about deeper themes than they appear to be. But, that could be reading too much into them. Silverstein is a master at poetry, a topic that is usually daunting and dry to students and adults alike. Read one of his poems a day to familiarize your students with the rhythm and lyricism of poetry, or just to add a bit of fun (who doesn't love “Sick” or “Sarah Cynthia Sylvia Stout Would Not Take the Garbage Out”?). Many could be used as a hook to a lesson. I am going to put “Invitation” on a poster on my door. It reads, </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Invitation</i></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>If you are a dreamer, come in, </i> </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>If you are a dreamer, a wisher, a liar, </i> </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>A hope-er, a pray-er, a magic bean buyer...</i></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>If you're a pretender, come sit by my fire</i></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>For we have some flax-golden tales to spin.</i></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Come in!</i></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Come in!</i></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><i>Sparkle and Spin</i> by Ann & Paul Rand</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;">My exposure to Paul Rand came from my husband, who greatly admires Rand's work as a fellow graphic artist. This proves that art and design are not wasted on the youngest readers! Children often notice things that adults walk right by. We have grown accustomed to seeing the world a certain way, but children have an untrained eye and are keen observers. In <i>Sparkle & Spin</i>, Ann writes (and Paul illustrates) about the way that words are used and the magic in everyday language. It is written in rhythmic verse and “explores <span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">homophones, interjections, adjectives, verbs, and more” (I own this book and love it, but am using a review because our copy is packed away in our tiny apartment at the moment). (paul-rand.com) This is applicable to a unit on writing in the English classroom; forcing students to carefully choose the words they use in an essay. It would also be a good study in visual content, which is a section of required learning (7. Media in English III). Graphic design reveals the power of words not only through their lexical meaning but in the way they are presented, which is how advertisers and politicians (and used-car salesmen) target their audiences.</span></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
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</span></span></span><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><i>Goodnight, Goodnight</i></span></span></span><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"> by Eve Rice </span></span></span> </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">This book is illustrated entirely in three colors: black, white and yellow. The yellow is only used for pools of light, since the story is set at night. The book is for very young readers, probably who cannot read on their own yet, and the story is a city going to sleep at night. But the twist is that Goodnight is not just the salutation that a toddler says before going to bed- it is the main character of the story. This becomes more apparent as the story progresses, and makes one wonder if the title is a salutation to the main character. The setting of the story is also a city. Over the rooftops of a cityscape the moon rises. A cat tiptoes along rooftops and hunts for food (not everyone sleeps at night!). A chestnut vendor closes down his cart and walks home. Goodnight peers into windows watching the townspeople wind down from the day's work. This book could be used to introduce and explain personification. It could also be used to explore setting. This book is set in the city and has a very urban series of events. What would saying goodnight look like in a rural town or in a suburb? How do you know you are in a city? What are the elements of setting that impact the story? Another idea is to explore the use of color, or simplicity, in the illustrations. With only three colors, the artist conveys more than with a spectrum. Sometimes simple things are more powerful. </span></span></span> </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><i>Rumpelstiltskin</i></span></span></span><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"> by Paul O. Zelinsky</span></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">This classic brothers Grimm fairy tale is retold and richly illustrated for children (Zelinsky also illustrated Beverly Cleary's </span></span></span><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><i>Dear Mr. Henshaw</i></span></span></span><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"> and </span></span></span><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><i>Ralph S. Mouse</i></span></span></span><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">). The story goes like this: a beautiful young maiden is sold off to a king under the impression that she can spin straw into gold. Her own father was the one who told this tall tale to impress the king. Facing death, the girl is desperate. Suddenly, a tiny, strange-looking man appears and promised to get her out of her bind in return for jewelry. This continues three times, of course, the bargain escalating each time. The girl marries the king, has a child a year later and is on her way to a happy life when Rumpelstiltskin reappears and demands the child as the last promised payment for her deliverance. She begs, pleads and cries, and finally the man says if she can guess his name, the bet is off. She has three days. During the second night, she sends her maid out to find the man, and loyal servant that she is, she scours the countryside until she happens upon him dancing around a fire, preemptively rejoicing because no one knows his name is Rumpelstiltskin. Back she goes to her mistress, who guesses his name the next day and lives happily ever after! I would use this book for two things unrelated to fairy tales. First, the importance of minor characters in key moments of the plot. Take Shakespeare- it is usually a very minor (and often foolish) character who saves the day, or who unwittingly gets some major character in big trouble. There are no small parts, only small mistakes which lead to big outcomes. Secondly, I would explore pride. This maiden was sold off by her father who was just trying to impress his king. Then Rumpelstiltskin was foiled by his own pride- he had the deal sealed but could not wait to rejoice, thereby losing it all. How many great characters have had their downfall because of their own pride? And how many of us can relate?</span></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><i>Sam, Bangs & Moonshine</i></span></span></span><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"> by Evaline Ness </span></span></span> </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Winner of the 1967 Caldecott Award for illustration, this is one of my favorite children's books. I first read it in third grade, and though it had been years since I last read it in a library, I found myself brought to tears once again. Sam, short for Samantha, is a lonely little girl in Maine whose mother is deceased and whose father is a fisherman. She has a cat named Bangs and a friend named Thomas who believes all her tall tales. Her father's admonitions to stop telling “moonshine” stories goes unheeded until one of her stories risks the lives of those dearest to her. Again, the theme of friendship is very strong, especially since the protagonist seems to take it for granted. Bangs also plays the role of being Sam's conscious by “talking” to Sam and asking her poignant questions. This is really Sam questioning herself, though she will not admit it. The book also deals with contentment. Sam is lonely but does not rejoice at the little friend who hangs on her every word (Daisy Buchanan, anyone?) and little Thomas, though surrounded by riches, just wants a friend. What happens when we do not take into account the consequences of our actions, and risk what we do have to get what we only might have? Is it worth it?</span></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><i>Anansi the Spider: A Tale from the Ashanti </i></span></span></span><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">by Gerald McDermott</span></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">This fable from Ghana is simplified and retold for American children. Anansi the spider is a great folk hero of the Ashanti people, a funloving rascal whose six sons have to rescue him from his adventures. In the story, he falls into trouble, but his sons rescue him by use of their namesake-quality: See Trouble knows Anansi is in peril, Road Builder gets them all there, River Drinker swallows a whole river to save Anansi from drowning.... all the way down the line to Cushion who lets dad plop onto his back. In gratefulness for their help, Anansi wants to give them a gift. He finds a great white orb and asks Nyame (the God of All Things) to hold it for him until he can decide which son to give it to. Nyame, wise being that he is, decides to put it in the sky to be shared by all the sons, and all creatures on the earth. This book would be a great way to expose students to world literature, in the context of a unit or throughout the year. It also deals with cultural questions of existence: where do we come from? What is most important in life? How was the earth created? Students could write their own short story or children's book about the origin of a natural event (like volcanoes, or spoken language) and share it with an elementary class in the city. If studying modern literature, it could be used to analyze what a hero is, or rather, an antihero. Modern literature tends to favor a flawed but still admirable protagonist over the swashbuckling Renaissance man of classic literature. Anansi has some good and bad qualities, but in the end is still the hero of the story. Why? What qualities are important in a hero? How do flaws help define and shape us and help us relate to others? </span></span></span> </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"><i>The Velveteen Rabbit</i></span></span></span><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;"> by Margery Williams</span></span></span></div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><span style="color: #262626;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: small;">Talk about a tear-jerker! This is one of the greatest children's books of all time! A stuffed rabbit is given to a small boy, who over the years loves the shine right out of his eyes. At first, the rabbit is ostricized for being old-fashioned and unimpressive compared to the tin soldiers and mechanical toys of the nursery. But a wise old rocking horse encourages the rabbit not to listen to their mockery. They will not last, and once a spring snaps, it will be off to the ribbish heap for them. A real toy knows what love is and knows its value comes from the child who owns it, not the praise of others. Many a child grew up thinking his toys were real because of this book. I know I did. This classic work has so many possibilities in the classroom with teens and adolescents. For one thing, the topic of value and worth could be discussed in groups and paired alongside a novel the class is reading. The theme of hardship or trial being the very things that make us who we are is another life lesson that Williams handles so well. The book could also be used to talk about comprehension despite a semi-unfamiliar and outdated setting. This book is British and was published in 1922. Many of the words are odd to the modern American ear but nevertheless understandable in context. This could be a lesson for something old and difficult such as “The Devil and Tom Walker,” written by Washington Irving in 1824. The story is readable when given a little help with vocabulary. This would be encouraging to students who have a difficult time reading, because they could summarize the story to a friend and see that it is not necessary to understand every word and detail to connect with the deeper meaning of the story. </span></span></span> </div><div style="margin-bottom: 0in;"><br />
</div>freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-34145442230199975532011-09-25T13:30:00.000-07:002011-09-25T13:30:08.910-07:00Autumnal Equinox<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #741b47;">Ok, I missed it by a few days, but bear with me- I've had the most insane week. I heard recently that September/October is the most stressful part of the resident year and that gave me such relief! The other night, I dreamt of graduation-lol! Only eight months to go.... </span><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #741b47;">I was so inspired by this beautiful display made entirely of book pages.... </span><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.thenester.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/DSC_00941-465x700.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #741b47;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://www.thenester.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/09/DSC_00941-465x700.jpg" width="424" /></span></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #741b47;">the nester</span></i></div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #741b47;"><br />
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<span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #741b47;">cannot wait to have a cute little house with a fireplace and a little back yard and space enough (and maybe time enough?) to do things like this again. Oh yeah, and then un-bury our wonderful dining room table and chairs and all our dishes and kitchen ware and have people over again.... dreaming....</span><br />
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<a href="http://www.thenester.com/2011/09/20-ways-to-decorate-with-book-pages-and-other-things-about-the-book-party.html"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #741b47;"><b>link for directions</b></span></a><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: #741b47;"> should you be so inspired</span>freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-5124214138678385042011-09-04T19:02:00.000-07:002011-09-04T19:02:44.268-07:00wanderlustwhile spencer and i were mansion sitting this weekend (pictures of that to come), we looked through our honeymoon pictures - the condensed list- and it got me dreaming of a trip to paris. this is not a new plan. i have long since determined that we will make a trek in 2013, the ten year anniversary of my semester abroad. i would love to show him around praha, and bookend the trip with a honeymoon reminder in paris.<br />
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him:<i> what would you do with only three days in paris?</i><br />
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me: <i>eat. and walk along the river. and eat. </i><br />
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him: <i>visit the pompidou.</i><br />
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me: <i>go back to that one painting in the louvre we got kicked out before seeing. and go to Fauchon and Habitat and spend a buttload of money.</i> (i'm so eloquent)<br />
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here are some of my favourites from the over 1400 spencer took...<br />
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</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">gratuitous mush photo thrown in there. hey, it <i>was</i> our honeymoon. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">bonsoir. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
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freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-38501907677442829102011-09-02T04:35:00.000-07:002011-09-02T04:35:45.237-07:00spread the word!it's open season here at MTR! tell anyone you think might be interested in an amazing career changing the lives of students in memphis!<br />
<br />
<a href="http://memphistr.org/apply"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;">memphistr.org/apply</span></b></a>freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-18937635267468496362011-08-28T11:45:00.000-07:002011-08-28T11:45:30.900-07:00summertime waningat least i hope it is.<br />
<br />
before the fall brings shorter days and darker evenings, i will celebrate summer. i found this on a favourite blog and wanted to share<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://sproutedkitchen.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/CHEESE_PLATE_0001.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://sproutedkitchen.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/08/CHEESE_PLATE_0001.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>sprouted kitchen</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><br />
</i></div><div style="text-align: left;">yum. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">today has been the loveliest, most relaxing day in a long while. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">woke up at ten.</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">went to la baguette, the nearby french patisserie, to get danishes</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">made coffee, veggie & goat cheese frittata to accompany said danishes</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">ate a nice, slow breakfast with spencer</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">soundtrack to the day so far: garden state, phantogram, spencer's homemade led zepplin mix...</div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">about three hours of internet browsing, including the amazing ipad app Catalog, blog catch-up, searching for fall wardrobe wishlist items. anyone know where to find some silk knot earrings? </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">now to nap, journal, read my bible, ichat with fam, go on a long walk at shelby farms with spencer and end the day with dinner and <i>parks & recreation</i>. </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">ahhhhhhhhhh</div>freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4570844311000919097.post-71541049371922325202011-08-21T14:01:00.000-07:002011-08-21T14:01:41.776-07:00yearningit's that time of year for me...<br />
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i have the same excitement bubbling up in my soul for the onset of autumn that most people talk about around the holidays....<br />
<br />
cooler weather<br />
leaves<br />
tights<br />
boots! boots! boots!<br />
sweaters<br />
cider<br />
pumpkin patches<br />
cold rain<br />
darkening days<br />
halloween<br />
long walks outside with spencer (who enjoys summer like a cat enjoys water)<br />
soups!<br />
figs, apples, persimmons<br />
beaujolais nouveau<br />
our anniversary<br />
and new this year: baby waldon!<br />
<br />
did i mention boots? (<a href="http://piperlime.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=59771&vid=1&pid=169419&scid=169419002"><b>these</b></a> are on their way to me as we speak)<br />
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as i sit and enjoy my sunday afternoon blog-reading time, i think of how much i love decorating. i miss it. don't get me wrong, i love so many things about our cute little apartment- wood floors, tiny floor tile in the bathroom, cute wall trim and a 50's era swinging door to close off the kitchen- but i long for the time when we can move out to a little place of our own. maybe a little house in midtown or cooper-young, maybe a downtown loft (exposed brick!)... i want to paint. i miss our dark aqua wall in our condo, and i could do great things with rusty orange. i miss my acrylic ikea dining chairs and our dark espresso ikea dining room table that can hold 16 (really uncomfortably) people. sigh....<br />
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here are some photos that have me inspired and dreaming right now<br />
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<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-TADf-Ek2taY/Tk0Ysw9ETUI/AAAAAAAAGao/3ijO_4hrdRg/s1600/5437642178_65c5d093f7_z.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-TADf-Ek2taY/Tk0Ysw9ETUI/AAAAAAAAGao/3ijO_4hrdRg/s400/5437642178_65c5d093f7_z.jpg" width="236" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://relishsmallpleasures.blogspot.com/2011/02/look-what-i-made.html"><b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;">photo </span></i></b></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://hookedonhouses.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/blacknurseryfireplace.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://hookedonhouses.net/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/blacknurseryfireplace.jpg" width="302" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b>photo LA times, Domino</b></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b><br />
</b></i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://assets4.designsponge.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/3_jesse.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://assets4.designsponge.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/07/3_jesse.jpg" width="298" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;"><b><a href="http://www.designsponge.com/2011/08/sneak-peek-jesse-james-kostas-anagnopoulos.html">design sponge</a></b></span></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;"><br />
</span></i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.houseobsession.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/cabin11.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://www.houseobsession.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/cabin11.jpg" width="266" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><a href="http://www.houseobsession.com/2011/06/modern-rustic-cabins-designed-by-olson-kundig-architects/"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;">house obsession</span></b></a></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;"><br />
</span></i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://g-cdn.apartmenttherapy.com/2809744/081811KathrynBentleyHouseTour_Image4_rect540.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://g-cdn.apartmenttherapy.com/2809744/081811KathrynBentleyHouseTour_Image4_rect540.jpg" width="235" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;"><a href="http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/ny/hot-posts/apartment-therapy-house-tours-week-of-august-15-august-19-2011-154214?image_id=2809744">apartment therapy</a></span></b></i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b><br />
</b></i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/.a/6a00d8341c630a53ef014e8aca3551970d-300wi" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/.a/6a00d8341c630a53ef014e8aca3551970d-300wi" width="263" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;"><a href="http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/home_blog/2011/08/grace-design-santa-barbara.html">LA Times blog</a></span></i></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><i><br />
</i></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://hgtv.sndimg.com/HGTV/2010/04/27/DP_Modern-05-tiled-bathroom-fireplace_s4x3_lg.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="239" src="http://hgtv.sndimg.com/HGTV/2010/04/27/DP_Modern-05-tiled-bathroom-fireplace_s4x3_lg.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><i><a href="http://www.hgtv.com/rooms/modern-gas-fireplaces/pictures/index.html"><b><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;">hgtv </span></b></a></i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;"><br />
</span></i></b></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Fz-1tBHkjf8/TOvdnxYllMI/AAAAAAAAFb8/FDubPs-bwX0/s640/1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="267" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_Fz-1tBHkjf8/TOvdnxYllMI/AAAAAAAAFb8/FDubPs-bwX0/s400/1.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><b><i><a href="http://sabbespot.blogspot.com/2010/11/kitchens-that-make-me-want-to-cook.html"><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;">sabbespot</span></a></i></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><i><b><br />
</b></i></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://farm7.static.flickr.com/6147/6008358366_c2c37456f3_o.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://farm7.static.flickr.com/6147/6008358366_c2c37456f3_o.jpg" width="233" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><i><span class="Apple-style-span" style="color: black;"><a href="http://decor8blog.com/page/3/">decor8</a></span></i></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><i><br />
</i></b></div><div style="text-align: center;"><b><i><br />
</i></b></div><div style="text-align: left;">See some inspiring ideas? I need a way to catalogue my finds.... </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">also, I am in the mood for some new blog finds. What are your top five?</div><div style="text-align: left;"><b><i><br />
</i></b></div><div style="text-align: left;"><b><i><br />
</i></b></div>freesparrowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09973350656721946221noreply@blogger.com4